[critique] Re: New Song: How to Own Your Human

[Lee Gold <leeway@xxxxxxxxxxxx>]

the Ginger Cat wrote:
> 
> How to Own Your Human
> copyright 2001 by Nyani-Iisha Martin, Jacob Sommer, Rachel Silverman
> ttto "This is Not the Way to Get Laid" by Leslie Fish

The original song has an invariant chorus, which you've 
chosen to discard in favor of a last line that changes for each
verse.  Therefore it's important that the last line really suit
its verse.
> 
> Don't assume you deserve those treats
	I don't think "deserve" is quite the right word here.
	For one thing, a lot of people do appreciate cat 
	self-confidence/arrogance.  

		"If you misbehave, then you won't get treats"?
> 
> Just ignore those human calls
> Pretend you're chasing jingle balls
> Running around in stairs and halls
> This is not the way to be cute.
	This seems inaccurate observation.  
	Lots of people do seem to think it's cute.  
		"When you hear the humans call,
		Don't come up with a big hairball
		Or find a bed beneath to crawl:
		This is not the way to be cute"?
		
		
> 
>   Don't play the cool sophisti-"cat"
>   To show how bored you are.
>   Washing your butt for all to see
>   Just won't get you very far.
> 
> Don't skip washing, do it now
> So that you'll be the cat's meow
> You'll just have to do it anyhow
> Or else you're on the way to a bath.  [hey, wait, there's WATER in there!]

	These two verses contradict one another.  
> 
> Don't presume they love your bod
> Your purrs are not a quid pro "cod"
> Not since Egypt have you been god
> This is not the way to be served.
	Umm, again these first two lines seem inaccurate.
		"You know that they love to touch your bod
		But your purrs just aren't a quid pro "cod"?
> 
--Lee, who prefers dogs but who did have a couple of cats 
as houseguests (along with their owner) some years back